Eyes Wide Shut

"We so hyped Tommy, that you have confirmed you will be pledging the Forced Femboi Frat."

"We both got the most amazing vibes from you at the open house and think you are the cutest thing ever."

"It's the most successful pledge drive yet with Regular Boys, finally pleased people are getting it: Forced Femmies and Nice Straight Cuties go together like blue cheese dressing and buffalo wings."

"It would have been such a bummer, not to get you though Sweetpea."

"Yar I dunno why the regular Frats passed, you over, to me that's something those boys need to figure out in therapy and you need not worry about for a single second. These things happen for a reason, it's called astrology. For reals like those Borish Frats don't even appreciate Harry Potter, they legit suck."

"You are soooo Pretty Tommy that's threatening to some roided out fake Alpha and like if you took the repressed homosexuality and drinking yourself until you've got serious Erectile Dysfunction issues away, what would even be left of so called normal Frats?"

"Yar so it's not as infamous as the massive Public Humiliations and cringe makeovers our fellow Forced Femmies go through. Try and find a photo of me as Freshman pre holidays without my mortifying Afro Perm. But it is pretty hardcore the pledge ritual for Boyish Boys too."

"So like we blindfold Da Boysies so there's no peeking and we spoon feed you jars of Gerbers Baby food and if you can't guess what it is in just two lil spoonful's, we feed you the whole jar, which you gots to finish and like there's loads of rounds."

"Ya don't wanna get too many wrong as the finale of the hazing is you have lie back in a Bitchboi's arms and finish off a whopping big baby bottle of formula. We got first dibbs and thought you were pick of litter, for winning the Tag Team Vegan Hot Dog eating contest at our Labor Day kick off shindig. So you are in safe hands, Peaches."

"Then like after that we'll give you a lovely sudsy Bubble Bath, don't fret just us two, Diddums and then like you can sleep over in our room, just the one bed so it will be cozy and we can get stoned af and chit chat."

"That bits not part of the hazing we just think it would be cool to hang with our new Bro after and we both are crushing on ya. Oh you definitely are so getting in. Nope dating between Frat Brothers is totally supported by the leadership, Cisgirls are totally allowed as GF too obvs though it is some what frowned upon by some fer shure."

"No Pressure though we'll make sure they accept a certified Boy Babe like you though, Darling. Just don't like say anything rude about: Barbra Streisand, Fran Drescher, Ice Spice, Meghan McCain, Tess Halliday, Aidy Bryant, Zendaya, Dylan Mulvaney, Joan Of Arc, Lena Dunham, Any Female Comedian, Pam Grier, Iggy, AOC or someone like that and you are a lock, Dude!"